Welcome to Unpure! This is a newsletter for the purity culture deconstruction community. If you’re unfamiliar, purity culture deconstruction is the process of unlearning the harmful, shameful and often traumatic beliefs around sex and sexuality taught in conservative religions where abstinence is used as a form of control. To learn more about deconstruction and the mission of Unpure, you can visit our intro post here.
I am so excited to welcome so many of you to the Unpure community! Whether you are deconstructing and recovering from purity culture, you help others deconstruct, or you find yourself anywhere in between, I am so glad you’re here.
Deconstructors, mental health professionals, support group facilitators and more from around the globe (!) answered my call for event, support group and resource submissions. I am beyond grateful to each of them for being so willing to share their time and energy with the Unpure community, and I can’t wait for you all to learn more about the amazing resources available to you. Together, we can help deconstructors and religious trauma survivors overcome the isolation of deconstruction.
Without further ado, here is the first edition of Unpure!
Meetups, Support Groups and Events
Recovering from Religion In-person and Virtual Support Groups
Recovering from Religion is a non-profit organization that hosts both in-person and virtual support groups for those recovering from religious trauma. You can sign up for upcoming events here.
Stepping Forward Greenville Support Group for Residents in Greenville, SC
If you live near Greenville, South Carolina, joining the Stepping Forward Greenville Support Group can help you find local deconstruction events, like an affirming space event for LGBTQ+ students from the evangelical institution Bob Jones University.
Group member and event organizer Andrew Pledger says that the Facebook group offers support to those who are deconstructing and looking for community:
“Everyone in the group is loving and accepting. It is a safe space to talk about deconstructing and grappling with life after religion.”
The Vashti Initiative, Virtual Non-profit Organization
The Vashti Initiative provides online services including support groups, a hotline and a book club for survivors of religious trauma and spiritual abuse. The Survivors Support Group is held on the 3rd Sunday of every month, and the hotline is operative from 9am-5pm Central Time. The Vashti Initiative also offers a robust list of resources on topics ranging from cult recovery services to healing from conversion therapy and everything in between.
Do you work with deconstructors and want to be featured in a future edition of Unpure?
Coaching and Mental Health Resources
Meg Cowan, Sex and Relationships Coach
Meg offers online free and paid trainings aimed at helping anyone and everyone – deconstructors, the ex-religious, and even those who are still of practicing faith – deconstruct and unlearn purity culture. Meg client’s have found her trainings and resources instrumental in their own deconstruction process:
"As someone who was raised in purity culture and came out gay later as an adult, I gained a lot from this course personally as well as for myself in my marriage. The depth and variety of information, the inclusive language, and the opportunity to engage with others and say ‘same here’ was just what I needed and was looking for. I highly recommend this!" - a past client of Meg’s
I met Meg when she attended a deconstruction listening post I hosted over Zoom last spring. She speaks about deconstruction and overcoming religious trauma with incredible thoughtfulness and empathy.
You can visit Meg’s website for more information about her offerings and follow her on Instagram to learn about upcoming events.
Kate Vance, Licensed Therapist at HopePoint Therapy Group, LLC in Wichita, KN
Kate is a religious trauma-informed family therapist who specializes in working with LGBTQIA+ individuals, children aged 13 and up, and adults. She is experienced in purity culture and helping others navigate the complexities of deconstruction:
“I think therapists who have not had personal experience with deconstruction often struggle to realize the magnitude of this decision and the way it impacts every single area of the life of the person who is deconstructing. I understand that. I understand navigating romantic and even platonic relationships after coming out of purity culture. It is not easy and it is not something every clinician will understand.”
At this time, Kate works exclusively with Kansas residents. She offers telehealth and in-person services, and you can email her at kate@hopepointtherapy.com. Learn more about HopePoint Therapy Group here.
Faye Williams, All Aces/Your Body is Good Group Chat
Faye Williams is a somatic trauma coach and marriage and family therapy intern. Faye worked and studied under Dr. Laura Anderson, PhD, who co-founded the Religious Trauma Institute. Faye’s group chat, All Aces/Your Body is Good, offers community through ongoing discussions about healing from purity culture.
I first spoke with Faye last spring and she and I had a wonderful discussion about deconstruction. You can learn more about All Aces/Your Body is Good here.
Other Interesting Things
Speaking Up! With Andrew Pledger
Andrew Pledger, who’s mentioned above, hosts Speaking Up!, a fantastic deconstruction podcast. On the podcast, Andrew interviews deconstructors and religious trauma survivors on a range of religious recovery topics such as cult survival, purity culture and more. I spoke with Andrew about engagement journalism and the inception of Unpure on season 1 episode 25. You can listen here.
What did you think of the first edition of Unpure? Leave a comment below!